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Confessions Part II: The Loaner

Updated: Apr 30, 2021

Hey girl, hey!


Welcome to Part II of the Girlfriend’s, Budget series “Confessions”! Today I introduce to you someone who is very near and dear to my heart. Not only is she the number one fan of Girlfriend’s, Budget and star student of FCL Financial Coaching…. She also happens to be my wife. Meet Dee - The Loaner.

After a hard day’s work, Dee and I grabbed a glass of wine and reminisced on days passed. Here’s how the conversation went:


[Elle]: “It’s been a journey for you!”


[Dee]: “Yes, it absolutely has been.”


[Elle]: “So, what’s your first memory of the shift you saw in your finances?”


[Dee]: “When my credit score started improving and I was approved for my car and I just started seeing debt go away, but definitely the credit score… that was the biggest turn for me. I was just like wow!”


[Elle]: “Were you like ‘wow’ because you were surprised?”


[Dee]: “I was like ‘wow’ because I saw how far we’ve come. And I say ‘we’ because I couldn’t have done it without you. Oh man… we fought (laughing), but it’s been one hell of a journey that I do not regret doing.”


[Elle]: “What does it feel like?”


[Dee]: “It feels good. Sometimes I still get in my moments where I’m like ‘is this really happening?’ and then I realize ‘yeah, it is’... I have to keep reminding myself that I deserve it, instead of feeling bad about it because of my upbringing. But I’ve worked for this.”


[Elle]: “What were your first childhood memories of money?”


[Dee]: “We were never taught to save because it seemed like everybody was just trying to make ends meet. And even when my family tried to cover things up like everything was all good, you could see that it was still a financial struggle. We were also taught that you need to help people in your family no matter what situation you were going through. So I adopted that, not knowing that it was going to hurt me in my adult years.”



[Elle]: “So what have you learned in your adult years?”


[Dee]: “Dang, this is a pretty deep interview right now. (laughing) I have learned not to loan grown folks money and that you have to take care of yourself. You, yourself, are important and like your post said... don’t loan grown people money because many of them have the same opportunities in life to learn better money management habits... so why should you deprive yourself of greatness because you’re trying to support other people for that moment, but their habits are not changing in order to help themselves.”


[Elle]: “With you being “the loaner”, was it just a natural thing for you to do because you know me… It’s hard for me to just hand over my money like that (laughing), so what made that easy for you knowing that you probably weren’t going to get paid back?”